Gay Men's Toy Store

Tonight, we had some peops over for dinner. I was hung over from the night before (different peops) and not looking forward to it. But! As usual, I was wrong.

They were straight, and a little bit Jewish, and friends from Ari's pre-school, which he is so over, and their daughter is a girl (as is the case with most daughters). I, as you surely realize, REALLY like grrls, but not girls. Because I am not some pedophile freak show. And Ari is, for the past two years or so, very macho, in spite of his mommies' best efforts.

Still, it went swimmingly, and I cannot decide whom I have a crush on. The dude is Seth, and the grrl is Magdalena, and she! Likes ballet! And he! Likes to drink! And makes sense! (This is harder than you think.)

Our children played happily together, while we drank a variety of wines which allowed me to use all my Wine Toys. Seth told me he loves all my playlists, even though music usually annoys him, and that my child is handsome and beautiful and has personality to spare. Then Magdalena started talking about wanting a date to "Swan Lake," and of course I volunteered, since it meant I will be able to wear something fabulous and attend a ballet and flirt with some married, straight hottie (therefore no strings attached). I mean, wtf: put me in paradise already. 

However! Right when I was super-relaxed, Ari and Annie (the girl child of Seth and Magdalena) announced, from behind their make-shift counter, that they were accepting customers to their "Gay Men's Toy Store." Of course, since I am queer in All The Ways, I decided this was somehow my influence, and that I would lose my ballet date and also my new drinking buddies with built-in entertainment for my son. Because, let's face it, no matter how queer one is, a gay men's (sex?) toy store is not really an appropriate pretend situation for a couple of five-year-olds.

Annie and Ari did some kind of spinning thing at the top of the staircase, with the drink umbrellas we queer folk tend to have on hand.

My new crushes took it in stride. Magdalena emailed within moments of leaving to confirm our ballet date. So. This is one of those moments when the universe surprised even me, the eternal optimist. I felt, this evening, like my value as a human had to do with me, and maybe my wine accessories, and maybe my playlists, and maybe the things I had to say, and the values I'd worked to instill in my son, and the geniusness of the woman I'd chosen to marry. And all of those things are the things I would choose to be measured by, if I could choose. They matter, to me.

Here's to a world where we're all able to show our strengths and be counted for them -- whatever strengths we choose. And where gay men's toy stores and paper umbrellas are the debris of children everywhere, to a world where there is ballet, even for lesbians and boys. Hear, hear!