Shoes are overrated.

I know that I take my life in my hands when I write this. I know that many will be affronted, and those who are not will pretend to be. But sometimes you've just gotta throw caution to the wind because something needs to be done. 

Shoes are overrated, and it is not right. I am into fashion. I am! I'm not a clotheshorse, but my peops are. Casey rocks the Kurt Cobain look. B has that classic black chic thing going on, with a twist: cute, too big, fuzzy sweaters. Actually, Casey has a fuzzy black sweater, too, and she also looks great in it--but hers is men's, and she probably found it in an alley and ripped it up a bit before she wore it. My friend Mara makes everybody within 100 feet of her look like a schlub, and Ev can pull of a sweater vest or bow tie any day of the year. My peops can dress. 

These might make somebody's outfit, but that is only because a toddler is like 90% feet. Tragically, they do not come in my size.

I'm not a fashion idiot. I do, however, passionately believe that shoes do not, under any circumstances, make an outfit. Now, before you bitches all call the police and take my queer card away, you need to hear me out. I like shoes, but they are, at best, an accessory, and maybe this, too, will get me in trouble, but accessories do not save you. Sorry. Shoes are on your feet, people, and nobody is looking there much. And if you have a shirt or dress or suit that does nothing for you, no accessory, not even a shoe, will change it.

I've seen some awesome shoes in my lifetime, and at various stages of my emotional development I believed that all would be well if only they had those shoes in my size. But with the inter-webs I can have any shoe I want, and I have to say, not much has changed with my shoes. 

J. Crew names its boots--stupidly, if you ask me.

I have a leather jacket that makes heads turn. It makes my mornings better when it's cold. I have a pair of jeans I like. When I wear them I feel like I could do anything, and I'm right! But nothing ever got better for me because of a shoe. Nobody's looking--really.

The end.